Tuesday, November 09, 2004

See Ya

A couple of days ago I was visiting a friend’s site and saw that one of his other visitors, a woman I don’t know and whose name I don’t recognize, took issue with his “cut and paste” post. She ended her comment with “I won’t be reading anymore. Thanks for the turning me off.” [sic]

The very next comments, a friend of mine responded to this woman—a bit strongly, but nothing hugely inflammatory. I saw her response and, assuming this woman really was never coming back, I wrote (in a light-hearted manner), “(My gut response was something more along the lines of "go fuck yourself", but your comment is much more diplomatic.)” My friend replied something equally ridiculous back to me, and boy did that start an unintended and un-asked for shit-storm.

The woman who said she’d never come back was, in fact, back! She explained that she felt PERSONALLY insulted by the blog-host’s cut & paste post, went on to say some other things and ended with, “As for telling me to go *uck myself, well I find that people who don't have an intelligent argument usually say that out of frustration.”

How embarrassing. She’s absolutely right—and I like to believe I’m usually above such petty bullshit. But as I mentioned, I didn’t think she’d be coming back. I didn’t think she’d ever see my recommendation.

Anyway, I responded again by laughing. Whatcha gonna do? Laugh or cry, I guess, so I laughed. I tried to make it light. Nope; she’d have NONE of that! She was bound and determined to keep it as nasty as possible. It felt as though since one of “us” said the mean thing first, she suddenly had permission to keep it as mean as she felt she could get away with.

Followed closely by a handful of folks who wouldn’t post their email or homepage information, but spent too much time gloating that they won. Umm, ok, go ahead. I read the newspaper, I listen to the news. I’m aware of who won. I wasn’t questioning that, I was responding to a cut and paste post—we were being light hearted, folks. How quickly did that turn nasty? Way too fast for my comfort zone.

The blog-host and another friend were kind enough to turn the subject to what I hoped would be a less inflammatory thread. Ha. Dreaming again. Yet another woman I’ve never heard of decided to “get into it” with those of us hanging around the site.

I caught a typo in her post and, as I am wont to do, I did my little “you wrote xx, but you meant xx; see the difference?” Whhhoooo!!! Let me tell you—that did NOT go over well. I apologized, explained the inside joke, and we went on to have a more-or-less civil discourse (though it’s clear to me that she either doesn’t know or doesn’t understand the legal “rule of reasonability”). I think we agreed to disagree on whether or not it is acceptable to legislate morality.

Movin’ on… or so I hoped.

It seems there is some deep division happening in blogville. I don’t want to be involved, and I don’t want to be asked to “chose sides”, because I’m not sure my friends would like my choices. The last round of comments on the site ended with YET ANOTHER someone I don’t know personally attacking me. Me. Personally. “You, Aimee, are exactly the asshole, whinning [sic] librals [sic] that I was refering [sic] to.”

Excuse me, you pansy-ass little boy, you don’t know who I am. You don’t know a god-damned thing about me. I know you, though, I’ve met you too many times in my life not to recognize you this time.

When you first appeared on my radar at a mutual friend’s blog, you seemed angry. I went to your blog to check you out and left a conciliatory comment, thinking perhaps since we had comment blog-friends that we, too, would have some commonalities, or at least cause to be civil. Not only did you not respond to me, but you deleted the comment I left you and then had the overreaching nerve to insult me on someone else’s blog.

You’re so proud of your Doc Martins and your brass knuckles, little boy, and how many times a week you have to beat the crap out of some guy for insulting your sister. It’s only time before you end up in an abusive relationship or in jail. Unless you grow up—because you sound like beneath all that brass and bravado there’s potential for an intelligent person. But don’t you DARE tell me I have growing up to do; don’t you DARE tell me I’m childish, short-sighted and intolerant. Don’t you Dare! You don't know the first thing about me or my life.

Yeah, I wrote "go fuck yourself" somewhere early on in the comment thread, but as I've explained AD NAUSEUM, I wrote them *AFTER* the original commenter said she wouldn't be coming back. And, if anyone cares to recall, I was actually writing to a friend, telling her that was my gut reaction but NOT what I actually said.

I'm overwhelmingly frustrated at myself right now that I let some two-bit, half-educated, smart-mouth kid get to me, but I did so now I have to deal with it.

Perhaps a break from blogville is just the ticket. Lest anyone think I’m calling for a pity-party, rest assured, I’m not. I just need to decompress. I can’t let people I don’t know get me so riled up. It’s just not right.

See you in a few days.