Friday, September 03, 2004

Random Thought, just like the woman said...

I don’t like Samuel Becket’s writing, per se, but I do admire his style. There’s something very soothing about writing in a stream of consciousness, but it’s overbearing and difficult to read someone else’s unedited thoughts. So I was going to sit down and write a stream of conscious post, but I find myself editing for readability even as I type these words (well, that and, even though I type 70+ words a minute, I have to slow down to spell the word “conscious”).

I started in this manner because I really didn’t know what to post today, and as much as I am loathe to bump “cocoa-eyes” off the main screen, I don’t want to be gone for a 3-day weekend with the same post sitting there.... So here I am rambling away about nothing in particular.

I like Costco. I like it a lot. I could spend too much money in there on a regular basis, but fortunately I don’t have to go in very often. My mom usually does the household shopping. Have I mentioned yet that she likes Costco, too? We always end up with something extra that was too good a deal to pass up. She makes me laugh.

I love it that my mom makes me laugh. I do not love that every time I write about her, I feel compelled to explain my relationship—but that’s my own insecurity (I don’t want people to think I’m a 16 yr old unwed mother living with my mom, you know? I’m a 37 yr old unwed mother, and my mom lives with me! Right, not a lot of difference is there… Hahaha). As I was saying…I love that my mom makes me laugh; I love that our relationship is, after so many years, finally a very comfortable, friendly one. I even secretly wish a little bit that my friends are jealous of that relationship, but I hope my sisters are not.

Emily has worn diapers every day for the last week plus. It’s disappointing, but I don’t want to push her. She still pees in the toilet periodically, and she knows she can’t go back to Ballet until she wears panties all the time. I’m trying very hard to teach her about mutual respect and I believe that if I show respect for her feelings, that’s the first and most important step. But when I want her to wear panties instead of a diaper, it can be hard to hold onto the big picture. I have to deliberately remind myself not to push her outside of her comfort zone. It’s frustrating.

My computer at home is still not functioning properly. I have absolutely no idea what’s wrong and I can’t fix it myself. I can get on-line, but I can’t read anyone’s comments (the comment indicator doesn’t appear on-screen); and I can log into Yahoo, I can see if someone has sent me an IM because the screen pops up, but the text is not visible. I can’t check my work email through webmail because that’s one of the sites that doesn’t appear, and I can’t check my home email either because also isn’t showing up. I don’t know what to do, but I do know that the idea of 3 days without a computer is making me a little bit crazy. I’m going to miss you guys.

How long does a salaried person have to stay at work on the Friday before a 3-day weekend? What’s a reasonable amount of time? I mean, if I left at 10:00 in the morning, that’s a bit early, but is noon? Or maybe 1:00? I’m ready to leave now, except that it would mean no blogging for nearly four days, and that would be even worse than having to work.

I could ramble on like this forever, but I ought to work now. Dang.

Despite the computer issues, I will work on the final posts you’ve been asking for. I can’t promise when they’ll be up, but I’ll work on them. If all else fails, I’ll email them to someone else & have them post for me. ;)

You guys have a great weekend. See y’all on Monday morning.